Anthony King: 2009

I think this movie might be my ultimate nightmare. Not the events I assume are depicted in the movie, but the actual viewing of the movie itself.

Growing up, my dad only really enjoyed watching James Bond films - because they were so ridiculous he never had to fully invest in the unbearable tension the modern action/suspense/horror auteur works so hard to instill in your psyche.

I used to think my dad’s unwillingness to invest was ridiculous, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve started to feel his pain.¹²³ And the seemingly illogical, violent fiasco hinted at in the trailer of The Strangers is representative of every dread-filled nightmare of suspense I simply can no longer bear watching with an over-sized Diet Coke and oily popcorn in my lap.

Though I must admit, I’d LOVE to hear a description of the film’s action from a disinterested audience member. Because while I no longer have very much interest in experiencing suspense, I love hearing about it secondhand.

¹sadly this is only one of the ways I am becoming more and more like my father

²(e.g. the coin-flip scene in No Country For Old Men almost killed me)

³I’ve been reading too much David Foster Wallace